If I Just...

Confession: I have spent a lot of time lately wishing that things in my life were a little bit different.

If Baby P would just go to bed when I want him to and sleep through the night...

If Little B would just cooperate with our potty training efforts...

If I could just get rid of this pregnancy weight and stretched skin...

If Little B would just willingly clean up his toys...

If I could just get dinner made without needing to stop in the middle of cooking to nurse...

I don't think I'm alone (at least I hope I'm not) in knowing that while I'm very blessed, I often wish for more.  And I know this isn't a terribly healthy place to be.

But then yesterday morning I opened my Bible and read the story of Jesus speaking with the Samaritan woman..."whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” (John 4: 14)

And then this morning I opened my Bible and read the story of the bleeding woman..."When she heard about Jesus, she came up behind him in the crowd and touched his cloak, because she thought, “If I just touch his clothes, I will be healed.” Immediately her bleeding stopped and she felt in her body that she was freed from her suffering." (Mark 5: 27-29)

Two mornings in a row...okay Lord, I'm starting to get it.  Why am I spending all this energy on my if-I-just's when I know that those things, even if I get them, will not satisfy me?  This woman, who had been bleeding for 12 years and been completely ostracized by her community because of it, had the right idea.  If I just touch God...If I just seek God...If I just have faith, then I will feel better.  And what does Jesus say to her?

“Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering.” (Mark 5: 34)

Dear Lord, please help me to stop obsessing over the things that bother me about my life right now, and do a better job focusing on the one thing that will always fulfill and never let me down.

"...I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord" (Philippians 3: 8)