The best gift

I am close to finishing my third semester in seminary, working to earn my Masters in Christian Education.  I also started working part-time this month at my church, serving as the Interim Director of Children's Christian Education.  And I have two young kids.  So as you can imagine, I spend a lot of time thinking about kids and church.

I think about it so much that it even spills over into the infinitesimal amount of time I have for pleasure reading.  I'm currently in the middle of a small but powerful book called Parenting in the Pew.  The idea is that children should be in a church's sanctuary participating in worship from a very young age.  If we hope or expect our kids to attend church and be people of faith as adults, then it makes sense for them to participate in one of the main parts of church and to learn by experiencing what worship is about.  The book has many suggestions for how parents can facilitate this with their kids (which I won't go into here) but with that in mind...

I was sitting with my two wiggly boys in the family Christmas Eve service tonight.  Little B is used to sitting in worship with us but he was still in a mood and pretty squirmy.  So when we started singing a hymn he knows, I excitedly caught his attention and invited him to sing along.  AND HE DID!  My friends, I think this was the first time he ever sang in church, fully participating in the fellowship of believers that had gathered to worship God.  It brought tears to my eyes.  It was the best Christmas gift I didn't even know to ask for.  And my heart overflows.

"But Mary treasured all these words and pondered them in her heart..." (Luke 2: 19)

I hope each of you has wonderful things to treasure and ponder in your heart this Christmas.  Alleluia, Emmanuel has come, God with us.

Advent Week 3

Sunday: Today we turned our angel tree gift in to church.  I tried to enlist Little B's help on shopping for the gift and wrapping, neither of which was all that effective but I think he's old enough to begin to understand that this is an important part of the Christmas season.  We went grocery shopping a couple days later for some food to donate to a food pantry.  He was able to get a little more involved with that, but I think the concept is still a bit lost on him.  Oh well, I'll keep trying.  I also had Little B "paint" Christmas cards to give to his preschool and Sunday School teachers.  I envisioned finger painting, Little B turned it into full-hand painting.  Oh well, he had fun:)

Monday: Did you know the concept of repetition overload is lost on three year olds?  I have listened to the John Denver and the Muppets Christmas CD and read the Berenstain Bear Christmas books more times in the last month than is believable.  But Little B is completely addicted and I know that for better or worse they'll all be packed away by the end of the month so I indulge him.  Anyone else want to take a turn driving him around and/or reading to give Hubby T and I a break?!

Tuesday: We received a surprise in the mail today from our Gigi - a Christmas carousel!  There is a little calliope which is connected to six carousel horses that move up and down and light up and play Christmas carols when it's turned on.  Little B calls them Santa's horses and Baby P calls them "ho" in his adorable attempt to say "horse."  I think the pieces are supposed to hang from the bottom branches of the tree, which of course we can't do with Baby P so it lives on the mantle, at least for this year.  All in all, great fun for my little ones:)

Wednesday: We've been told all year that Little B's music class would have a special Christmas activity.  We've been singing a song about the gingerbread boy for a couple weeks now, so it wasn't a huge surprise to me when the teacher presented each child with their very own gingerbread boy to decorate!  Due to a couple kids' dietary restrictions, we didn't decorate real cookies in class but had felt gingerbread cut-outs instead.  The teacher did send us home with real cookies though, which Little B promptly decorated and then handed over to us to eat.  I am so grateful that this kid is so easy going about his no-gluten diet!

Thursday: Today was Little B's preschool Christmas party.  His teacher has been telling us all month that the kids have been working on surprises for us and it was true.  We came home with several hand-made ornaments, a book from Santa (who showed up at the party), and some video of a very lackluster Little B standing with his classmates, not singing, but then again most of them weren't either.  I'm so glad this preschool didn't have a big program or make a big deal of them performing because Little B is so not a performer.  But he does know the words to Rudolph by heart and called "Away in a Manger" his favorite song, so I know he's been learning something this month at school:)

Friday: Today we had our grinder pump replaced.  There is nothing Christmasy about this but that's what our day was about - not being able to put anything down any pipe in our house until it was fixed.  Alleluia it was fixed, but the spirit of the season was a bit lost in the midst of this mini-house-crisis.  We still played Christmas music while we ate dinner, hopefully that counts for something in this little Advent diary of mine...

This kid loves to "cheese" for the camera!

Saturday: Today we celebrated an early Christmas with Gramma, Grampa and Auntie A.  We had my family's traditional Christmas morning sticky buns, shared presents with one another, and realized that Little B is at the age where all he's interested in are his presents.  I also learned when we got home that he's very interested in decorating Christmas cookies, to the extent that once all the cookies were decorated I had to promise that he could "decorate" his ice cream for dessert, which he did.

Hmm, there was a lot about Little B in this week's post.  As I said at the beginning, he is experiencing Christmas on a whole different level this year, so that's how I'm experiencing it a lot too.  Baby P's time will come.  In the meantime, he's keeping us all jumping and laughing (and occasionally pulling hair out).  Not much longer now....

Advent Week 2

December 7: On this night we attended our town's annual Christmas celebration, which includes fireworks!  Every time there was a pause Baby P would say, "All done?"  Little B had seen fireworks before, and was pretty cold, so he wasn't overly impressed with this little Christmas tradition.  It did wear him out though (or maybe that was just all the fun he had with all the family who came with us...)

December 8: Hubby T's Yiayia brought us some gifts from the closing sale of her local Hallmark store, including this super fun Christmas story.  It's an interactive book that responds to certain lines of the book being read.  To little children it sounds like Santa is talking with us as we read.  I don't think Little B actually thinks it's Santa talking to him, but we're enjoying it just the same:)

December 9: I love dressing my kids in holiday clothes.  It's shocking how quickly Baby P is fitting into Little B's hand me downs!

December 10: It's a fairly common occurrence for Hubby T to take the kids outside to play in the late afternoon when I'm finishing school work or starting dinner.  One of the highlights of this season is how they take advantage of that time to walk around the neighborhood and look at Christmas lights.  The super crazy house within their walking radius is lovingly referred to by Little B as "the blinking Christmas lights house,".  He seriously loves this house and asks that we drive by it anytime we drive home after dark.  I didn't take a picture because it's hard to take pictures in the dark, plus it would be creepy if the owner saw us, so you'll just have to imagine the glee of an almost four year old in front of a completely decked out for Christmas house. 

December 11: One of Little B's daily joys this season is putting an ornament on our magnetic Advent tree.  This perfect for little hands, and fits perfectly on our mantle out of their reach!

December 12: Tonight Little B and I went on a mommy-oldest son date to see our church's Christmas play.  We invited Little D and his mommy to come with us, which was super fun.  We decided the boys are still a little too young to really get into the play, but we took them out for frozen yogurt afterwards, so all in all the night was a hit:)

December 13: I know I already devoted a "day" to Christmas clothes but Christmas pajamas are just too cute to ignore.  The boy's Mom-Mom bought them matching footie pajamas just for Christmas Eve/day - I'm pretty sure they're going to be too adorable for words!

One more full week until Christmas - getting excited!!

Advent Week 1

The season of Advent is upon us and I am shame-facedly confessing that I prepared nothing to guide my children or myself or my family through this season.  No preschool devotion books.  No countdown to Christmas chain.  No elf on a shelf.  It's taking all my energy and focus (and then some) to keep all the balls I'm juggling up in the air, then we add in Christmas.  But I'm not complaining because we are still enjoying and commemorating the season in little ways.  Little B is understanding everything in a whole new way this year and his joy is amazing to behold.  So I'm going to do my best to share something about each day this season because these boys are growing and there will never be another Christmas quite like this one...

November 30: We bought our Christmas tree today.  Hubby T thought this needed to be a family decision so we took turns chasing Baby P away from the major road that is right next to the church where we buy our tree while trying to pick out a tree.  Yup, 17 months is fun!

December 1: Tonight we lit the first candle in our Advent wreath and tried to explain to Little B that it is the candle of hope...

Me: What's something you hope for Little B?
Little B: That I get everyone on my list from Santa!
Me (thinking): Hmm, maybe I should have spent more time finding a preschool-level Advent devotional...

December 2: Little B asked to make Christmas cookies today and I, much to my dismay, had to say no because I didn't have time.  Instead, I came up with the oh-so-brilliant idea of taking his gluten-free Joe-Joe cookies (Trader Joe oreos), slicing them in half and giving him sprinkles to "decorate" his cookie.  He was thrilled and I was no longer a disappointing mommy, win-win:)

December 3: So apparently I bought Elf on a Shelf last year and completely forgot I had it until we unpacked Christmas things this year.  We're not making a big deal out of it at all, we just call him Elf, and Baby P is in love, which he expresses alternately by hugging Elf and forcefully throwing him across the room!

December 4: Little B's preschool sent home a song book with lyrics to the Christmas songs the kids are learning for their Christmas party in a couple weeks.  I am taking every opportunity I can to sing those songs so that Little B will learn the words and get comfortable with the songs.  His favorite song coming into this season was Jingle Bells, but Rudolph is quickly rising in his estimation;)

December 5: Last weekend I told Little B that he could stay up and have a movie night with us.  I turned on the Frosty movie that is on Netflix, which is different from the original but I kept expecting the story to turn out fundamentally the same.  It doesn't.  The version on Netflix stinks.  Even Little B thought so, without having any knowledge of the original.  I think we'll watch Polar Express next.  We've been listening to the soundtrack, which Little B tolerates, so I have much higher hopes for that movie night:) 

December 6: Christmas came early today with the visit of Hubby T's parents, grandparents and aunt and uncle, who brought some early presents.  The Hess truck for this year was a humongous hit!  If you are still looking for a gift idea for your three or four year old, go buy the Hess truck and your child will love you forever.

We're already down to two full weeks before Christmas, stay tuned for more Family P celebrations!

Jesus loves me

When I first started studying theology last semester, my professor wrote in her syllabus that once you start looking for theology, you find it everywhere.  Boy was she right.  I saw the Broadway show Book of Mormon last weekend, and don't worry, I'll spare you my theological analysis of that one, but it did make my viewing experience much more rich than if I'd seen it a year ago!  Instead I'm going to share something I think about every night because I sing it almost every night as I put Baby P to bed, that seemingly timeless children's classic "Jesus Loves Me,".  You may think it's simple but once you start studying theology, you'll realize that its words can actually leave your head spinning.

"Jesus..."  Let's start with the first word - Jesus.  You may think you know who Jesus is: the Son of God, Christ, the reason for the season, the reason for Easter candy.  There are all sorts of connotations that each of you bring to your understanding of Jesus.  But theologically speaking, we believe Jesus is part of the Trinity.  Father, Son, and Holy Spirit are all connected and work together and fully united, and yet are also separate essences.  How can three parts equal one?  Was Jesus an inspiring historical figure or actually God?  And if he was actually God was he also fully human?  And if so, how could he be both fully human and fully divine at the same time?  (Is your head spinning yet?  I'm just getting started.)

"Jesus loves me..."  I'll confess that we haven't discussed God's love for us specifically as an individual topic, at least not yet.  I'm thinking it's so fundamental to who God is that it's just a part of every conversation.  So I won't say too much here but the bottom line is, we humans and each of us individually are part of God's creation, which God declared good, and when God made humans God declared them, "very good."  I think that's the Biblical foundation for the idea that God loves us, and in some ways, the whole Bible is just a continuation of that story.

"This I know..."  Well, if you think you know anything about God or your faith, just try studying theology and you'll be soundly knocked off your feet very quickly.  But despite that, I still walk away from everything I study not wavering.  I do know that Jesus loves me.  Nothing has happened to me in my life to rock that conviction (although I can think of things that have happened to others).  So enough on that for now.

"For the Bible tells me so..."  So this isn't so much a theology question but I have touched on it in other classes.  Can we actually believe what the Bible tells us?  Should we accept it at face value and believe it literally?  Or should we learn about the historical context in which the Bible was written, who it was written by, who they were writing to, how the Bible has been interpreted throughout history, etc.  I subscribe to the later idea, so the idea of teaching young children (via this song) to believe that Jesus loves them just because the Bible says so is a little hard for me to swallow.  But I do want my children to believe in the authority of the Bible, and their young minds can only handle so much, so I'll let this one slide....for now.

So there you go.  Who knew putting a 16 month old to bed could be so theologically stimulating?!  These thoughts only scratch the surface of what I've been learning about in school, so hopefully you can understand why this space has been so silent.  But hopefully you've also been challenged to think a little deeper about your faith by reading this.  The story of God's love for creation, which this song proclaims, is so incredibly deep and so incredibly rewarding to delve into.  Drink deep friends...

"And so we know and rely on the love God has for us.  God is love.  Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him."  1 John 4: 16

Some fall favorites

School starts again on Monday, so I'm not sure how much time I'll have to post here for awhile.  I figured I would leave you with a few things that have been bringing joy, inspiration and and "mmmm" to my life lately.  Hopefully they might do the same for you!

Perfect Pumpkin Bread - No kidding, this bread is perfect.  There is also a link here to make your own pumpkin pie spice instead of buying some at the store.  I had everything it called for already in my cabinet, which made it extra easy.

Painting the gourdes he picked out at Pumpkinville

Almost Amish: One Woman's Quest for a Slower, Simpler, More Sustainable Life by Nancy Sleeth.  This is one of the most thought provoking books I have read in a long time.  Living simpler is something I already think about a lot.  I wish I had been more mindful of it when we first had kids, maybe then I would have less to get rid of now!  It is especially on my mind this time of year as I anticipate/dread the consumerism attack of the holiday season.  But anyway, back to the book.  It is the author's story of how her family's faith journey led them, over many years, to simplify and make more intentional choices about their lives as a way of honoring God and creation.  Much of what she talks about are principles that I and many of my friends would probably agree with as part of practicing our faith, she just takes them to a deeper level.  For example, to be "almost Amish" you can live with electricity.  But what appliances do you have that maybe you don't need?  The author doesn't own a dryer.  She hangs her clothes on a line in the back yard when it's nice out and in her basement when it's cold.  This saves her money on her electricity bill, there is one less appliance feeding off the electricity grid and to eventually dispose of when it wears out, and they turned laundry into a task that is done together, giving parents and children time to talk and be together while accomplishing a task.  Maybe it sounds idealistic, or unrealistic, to many but I found it intriguing.  And this is just one example.  She also speaks quite a bit about making intentional choices to live near your family (she and her husband live within walking distance of both their adult children), to live near and invest in your community.  "Being green" and "shopping local" have become buzz phrases in our culture that many either embrace fervently or just ignore.  This book is an interesting perspective on what those things can really mean and look like, especially within the context of living out your faith.

Have you ever dug into a deep bowl of freshly made guacamole and wished you could eat the whole thing without feeling guilty?  My friend, I have the solution.  This Tex Mex Spaghetti Squash with Black Bean Guacamole is fantastic.  The squash really just serves as a platform to consume the aforementioned delicious and completely addictive guacamole. The dish is has vegetable, protein, and healthy fats all in one.  It also happens to be the perfect dinner to make while watching a 4:30 football game - prep the squash before kickoff, roast it during the first half, throw the guacamole together during halftime and voila - awesome healthy game food.  Enjoy:)

No matter how much you scold, you can't stop me from sitting here Mommy!

Tired of sandwiches for lunch?  I am.  But this Tuna Salad with Apples and Pumpkin Seeds has made lunch exciting again.  After I made this the first time I told Hubby T that I may never make a tuna melt again.  In hindsight that may have been a little extreme, because tuna melts are still delicious, but this is a much healthier and still completely delicious alternative.  I also like this because it's versatile.  I didn't include pumpkin seeds the first time because I didn't have any.  I definitely didn't use the fancy paleo-friendly mayo that the author recommends and I think any kind of apple would work, although tart probably would bring the best flavor to the dish.  The only bad thing about this dish is that Hubby T likes it too so I have to share...

And finally, I have been holding out on you for a long time with this one.  Smitten Kitchen's Kale and Quinoa Salad with Ricotta Salata may bring many different, unappealing adjectives to your mind but I can assure you the only one you need to focus on is awesome.  I should have shared this ages ago, maybe I did and I forgot but either way it's worth sharing twice.  I was initially skeptical of raw kale but it completely works.  Also, I don't think my grocery store even carries ricotta salata, so I always use feta.  And I use craisins instead of dried cherries because I always have craisins in my pantry.  Both substitutes work just fine.  Bring on the "super" foods!!

 
So happy fall friends:)  I'll try not neglect this space completely but for now my theology reading is calling...here I go again!!

Fun Friday Faces

Dinner in CW?  Ok Mommy:)

Here comes big brother!

Stretching break from dinner

Pure joy

More pure joy

Peace out homies

A week

What's that saying about things being deceiving?  For example, you would think looking at this picture of Little B on his first day of preschool that he was pretending to blast off into space (as his shirt implies), ready and overjoyed to embark on his great journey of learning.

In fact, he was holding his arms out to prevent his brother from falling and/or tossing his water bottle down the stairs.  Oh, and saying "Cheesey peasy!" because that's what he says for pictures now:)

You would also think that with Hubby T back to work, Little B off to school, and my school not yet in session that I would have tons of free time to do things like, you know, blog.  But somehow that isn't even remotely close to the truth.  I realized how bad I have been about taking pictures lately too (Baby P's babyhood is slipping away from me!) so I resolved this week to take more pictures everyday and to write about it.  So here you go - our life, at this moment, as represented by this week.

Monday:
I resolved today to be very present with my boys when it was time to be and play with them.  So I let Little B go wild doing art while Baby P took his morning nap (which he is growing out of, and I'm kind of okay with that).  Once Baby P was up, I packed a picnic lunch and we drove over to the playground.  It was beautiful weather, not at all crowded, and I rejoiced at the time to relax and let my boys be boys outdoors.  I also appreciated Baby P's exclamations of "ro! ro!" when we climbed into the canoe on the playground, as I'm pretty sure he was trying to articulate, "row, row, row your boat..."  Language is coming, I can tell!!  Once Hubby T was home we all enjoyed an afternoon snack of gluten-free or gluten-filled chocolate chip banana bread.  Little B ate his dinner with next to no cajoling from us, the boys played peacefully while I cleaned up and I even had a chance to play piano for a couple minutes.  It was a full, blessed, peaceful day.

Little B loves playing "art" these days, especially if it involves his own new scissors!

Tuesday:
Tuesday is now the first school day of the week for Little B.  I have entered the phase of mommy-hood where my day is scheduled around driving my children to and from their life activities.  Weather permitting I drop off and pick up Little B from his school's playground.  When we drove up to pick him up today he was standing at the fence, clearly waiting for me to show up.  The helicopter parent in me slightly panicked (why aren't you playing with the other kids?!)  But then I locked eyes with him and it took him a minute to register that I (and his Mom-Mom) were there.  But once he realized it his face lit up in that priceless way that children reserve only for those they love most.  We had a quiet afternoon playing with Mom-Mom and Papou, who were passing through mid-week on a quick trip south.  I think my favorite quote of the day was, "Mommy, what's those bugs on my salmon?"  (It was salt, pepper and dill.)  I'm also a little bit at a loss as to how on top of my weekly to-do list I am.  Perhaps I actually will get around to dusting my blinds or wiping off the baseboards this week!*

Sweet baby boy cuddles:)

Wednesday:
Today started out a bust.  We went on an errand to the DMV and were unsuccessful.  Then we tried to take the car in for its state inspection and were again unsuccessful.  So we went to our favorite back-up plan that never fails to delight - a walk in CW.  We filled our mug with cider, explored the maze and gardens behind the palace, and saw two oxen.  Might sound unexciting to you but for us it's a pretty awesome way to spend the morning.  My warm, fuzzy, peaceful feelings lasted until later that afternoon when I had to walk away from a hysterically screaming Baby P to take Little B to music class.  Can we say separation anxiety?  Yikes.  Poor Baby P and poor babysitter Grampa.  Ah well, you win some you lose some.  Today felt like a bit of a loser.

He doesn't nap much anymore, but he does have "quiet time" everyday, which sometimes leads to this.

Thursday:
Today was a win, because I reached out in different ways to two friends and I think all parties, including me, were blessed.  (I don't say that to brag, just to encourage myself that sometimes putting forth a little extra effort leads to good things.)  I enjoyed music class this morning with Baby P, who miraculously didn't throw his sticks and shakers as much today (yup, I'm the mom of the thrower, awesome).  Little B asked why he couldn't stay at preschool all day when I picked him up (good sign!)  I had time to do yoga during the boy's nap time.  And we spent an hour at the playground this afternoon with Little D and his little brother and mom.  Finding time for them all to be together is going to be harder now but still infinitely worth it.  (No picture of them though, I wanted to have fun chasing them around and not worry about the camera.)

My canister of spoons and cooking utensils is his favorite "toy" right now

Friday:
TGIF!  (Anyone else miss the tradition of ending every week with a bowl of popcorn, Boy Meets Girl and Sabrina the Teenage Witch?  Anyone?)  I hustled to get the boys out the door this morning so that we could go back to the DMV and get that business done (accomplished!) then we stopped at the library for new books and went to our MOPS church for story time.  I like to think I strike a good balance by focusing on the boys and doing things for them in the morning so that I can do things for me/things that I need to get done in the afternoon.  This works because the boys have nap/quiet time at the same time and Hubby T gets home by 4:30.  Today doing things for me meant getting a haircut and then going grocery shopping.  Maybe someday "me" time will be more glamorous, but for now I'm grateful to wake up on Saturday morning with a house full of food, knowing that my biggest job for the weekend is already done!  

Too cool in his shades

So those blinds I thought about dusting earlier in the week?  Yea right, totally didn't happen.  Who wants to dust their blinds when they have free time?  Not even me.  Ah well.  I'm going to enjoy my slower down time while I have it, and maybe take pictures like this instead...

 

Kentucky vacation

Our goal with summer vacation this year was to visit my grandparents.  The bonus is that they now live in the same town as two of my aunts and an uncle, plus my parents came with us, so it ended up being a half-of-the-family-ish reunion!

Four generations:)

We had a great time hanging with family, eating the delicious food that always seems to surround them, and showing off the boys.  We also visited the zoo, two pools, and a new walking bridge/park area.  It was not, however, an extremely relaxing vacation, which Hubby T and I blame squarely on these little munchkins.

I am 14 months!  I bring mayhem, destruction and cuteness wherever I go!!

Splash park at the zoo

I tell myself that someday they will be older and will amuse themselves at the pool while Hubby T and I kick back in lounge chairs and read.  Or maybe they'll kick back and read with us.  But for now, being on vacation is kind of like being at home - constant vigilance! 

My leg is stuck...but not for long!

Until, that is, they collapse as all young children eventually do...

Catch you again soon Louisville!  The boys had too much fun with their new buds to stay away for long;)

Guilt

I have been feeling guilty lately.  White-upper middle class-first world-educated-employed-have everything I need and a safety net kind of guilt.  Normally I think about this when I get focused on how much I want a new purse or nicer furniture or a bigger house, the kind of things that would be nice to have but can or should I really spend money on them when there are so many starving children in the world?  But lately, lately the news, and my guilt, is hitting home on a whole new level.  Because "my" people are being terrorized.  People who believe in the same God, in the same Christ that I believe in are being terrorized for precisely those beliefs.  Who am I, that I was born into a country that cherishes freedom of religion and they were born into a country torn apart by religion?  I try to put myself in their place.  How would I react if armed militants barged into my house, demand that I convert to Islam or be killed?  The idea of such a thing happening in my country is so absurd that I am dumbfounded.  How can anyone possibly think that is acceptable behavior?  And yet it's happening.  And now these people, my people, are trapped on a mountain.  Are they taking refuge in God, as the Bible teaches us to do?  Is their faith making their trial any easier?  Can they feel the prayers that Christians around the world are saying for them?  Do our prayers make any difference?

I sat safely ensconced between my grandparents at Mass this morning, a rare but special occasion for me.  And we sang a hymn called "Be Not Afraid,"

You shall cross the barren desert, but you shall not die of thirst.
You shall wander far in safety though you do not know the way.
You shall speak your words in foreign lands and all will understand.
You shall see the face of God and live.
Be not afraid.  I go before you always.
Come, follow me, and I will give you rest.

I couldn't help but put myself in the shoes of the Yazidi and wonder if the words of this song would mean anything if I was on that mountain with them.  The words are illogical, especially, I imagine, to those who are literally starving and dehydrated.  Yet I believe in a God that makes these words true. Somehow, though its hard to imagine how, I believe God is sustaining and strengthening my brothers and sisters in Christ.  Through the horror and the fear and the sadness.  Because let's face it, it's not like God hasn't seen this kind of suffering in the world before.  And it's not like we Christians haven't ever been the perpetrators (again, back to the guilt....)

So where does that leave me?  Besides fervently praying for those people and then returning to my very privileged life?  Probably because I'm so comfortable in my own life, there aren't many times when I pray for Christ's return.  But in the face of suffering like this, my heart can't help it...

Come, Lord Jesus, Come.

Who wore it better?

Once upon a time, long long ago, I was able to sit around and watch TV after dinner.  And sometimes I would watch E! News.  (Let it be noted that I am extremely grateful to now have other, more meaningful things to fill my evenings;)  They used to show a segment called "Who Wore It Better" where they would show two celebrities wearing the same article of clothing and ask people on the street who they thought wore the clothes better.  As Baby P keeps growing into Little B's hand-me-downs at astonishing speed I often find myself wondering, who wore it better?  (In case clarification is needed, Little B is on the left and Baby P on the right.)

I finally have time to write again!

A couple of days ago I was walking out of Costco with an overflowing cart, including my two little boys crammed into the seats of the cart (yes, Costco carts have room for two kids in the front seat, genius).  We passed a woman in the parking lot who had a little girl with her who was probably about ten.  The woman aww'd at my boys and as we walked past she nostalgically said, "I miss those days, but at the same time, I don't,".  I smiled and laughed because although I am on the opposite side of her statement I knew exactly what she meant.

My boys are now three and a half and one.  Baby P is literally stumbling his way into toddler-hood with amazing speed.  At the same time, I feel like Little B is on a precipice, anticipating all the growth and changes that will come when he starts preschool in the fall, and on some level I think he knows big change is coming too.  They are both becoming capable of doing so many things, yet at the same time my heart panics anytime we are near water because there is so much they are still not capable of.  Our days are filled with joy filled beautiful moments and deep sigh inducing frustrations, continually admonishing Little B not to knock his brother down from behind, or into hard objects, while simultaneously making room and time to read as Baby P picks up books from the book shelf, stumbles with them into our laps and settles in to be read to.  I spend my days making three different meals for every meal (one for Hubby T and me, a gluten-free meal for Little B and a meal that can be eaten with only two teeth for Baby P), trying to keep an energetic bursting with life three year old happy and occupied now that Little D isn't around to play with (at least on a regular basis), counting the minutes until it's time to put Baby P down for a nap so that I can have a little bit of a break, and then counting the minutes again until it's time for him to wake up so I can see his beautiful smile (who needs a break from this anyway?)

 My second semester of school was much harder but still incredibly rewarding.  I'm impatient to learn more but equally grateful for the break.  I'm impatient to put all I'm learning into practice but equally grateful that I don't hold all that responsibility yet.  I'm searching for new food inspiration (somehow almost all the food blogs I follow have dried up, any suggestions?) while enjoying some summer favorites (we had Greek Panzanella tonight, awesomely amazing every time).  I'm wrestling with all the clothes in my closet that no longer fit my post baby body and still struggling, a year later, to accept how I've changed.  I'm trying to reach out to mom friends who I've met in past months to build new relationships, to be a blessing to them, and to find new friends for my kids (we may actually have a birthday party with friends for Little B next year!)  I'm staying up later each night with Hubby T (working our way through Season 6 of Mad Men) and "sleeping in" until six am when Baby P wakes up, but somehow partly wishing I still had that 5:30 alarm so that I would have time to do my bible study and quiet time before the boys wake up.  I am anticipating Vacation Bible School at church, a weekend trip to the beach with college friends, and a week out of town to visit family later this summer.  My cup truly, in any and all ways you want to interpret it, runneth over. 

All this to say, while it may be summer and Hubby T may be home from work more and the heat and humidity may make me feel a bit sluggish, life is moving onward.  And we're moving along with it with a mindful appreciation for all we have, hope for all that is to come, and faith that God will meet us there.

"Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock.  The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock..." Matthew 7: 24-25