Isn't he adorable? How can I not share him with the world?! You can't help but smile when you look at him, right? Seriously, compare him to the Gerber baby - Baby B is infinitely cuter:)
So here I am, six months later, with an adorable bouncing baby boy and I am one week away from being a 100% full time stay at home mom. My mom stayed home when I was growing up and so did my husband's mom, so we both feel pretty strongly about providing that for our children. I wasn't wild about any of the jobs I had since graduating from college and I've always thought that I'd want to stay home with my kids. But now that it's here, I'm nervous. Will I get bored/restless being at home all the time? Will I run out of enthusiasm for playing with him when I have to do it all day every day? Will I be able to find other moms who I enjoy spending time with for play dates? And, perhaps the biggest leap of faith question of all, will me staying at home mean we can still pay our bills? (We think so, I wouldn't have quit my job if we couldn't make it work, but it'll be tight so it weighs on me.) But that leads me to the other big change coming up in our life - while staying at home with Baby B, I will also be watching another little boy, Baby D, who is the son of a couple my husband works with. I'm excited for Baby B to have a play mate and excited to be able to provide love and care for another little boy. But again, I'm nervous. How long will it take for Baby D to get to know me and get comfortable around me? And how unpleasant will it be for both of us until he gets to that point? How many bumps will they each have at the end of the day once they start moving around more actively? And how will I explain them to his mom without feeling terribly guilty for not taking better care of her baby?! Will Baby B and Baby D both want to eat lunch at the same time? There's only one of me (and only one high chair), so what happens when one has to wait? I can say "Please be patient" in my most loving and patient tone of voice all I want, but somehow I don't think that will stop a hungry baby from hollering at me!
Phew. Now that all those worries are out, let's focus on the positives. I get to spend all day every day with my awesome baby (who I love to the moon and back times infinity), and even on the hard days, I know (hope, pray) it will have an amazingly positive influence on his life. I get to be a blessing to another family by caring and loving their child as well (plus theoretically I'll have a handle on handling two kids at once whenever we get around to having another baby!) More time at home will hopefully give me more time to do the things I like to do, like cook and exercise and keep my house clean. (Just to clarify, I don't like cleaning house but I do like having a clean house - the end product makes the work worth the effort.) And next spring I'm going to venture into the world of gardening and try my first vegetable garden (we'll see how it goes, I don't generally enjoy digging around in the dirt). I'm also hoping that I can use my time at home to be a blessing to others. For example, next week Baby B and I are going to watch my friend's two boys while she goes to a meeting for the afternoon; she had exhausted her list of babysitters and I was free so voila - she's free to go to her meeting and Baby B gets to play with new toys:)
So back to my original thought at the beginning of this post, we'll see if this ever goes public. My husband really enjoys reading blogs and is highly intrigued by the idea of blogs earning money for the author, so I will confess that my hesitant interest in blogging is somewhat financially motivated. I'm not sure who would want to read my blog other than my family and friends who want to know what's going on in my life, and I'm not sure what I have to offer the world in my blog that would be of great interest or value to anyone. But I also don't know if it will evolve into anything more until I try. So expect to see more musings on my baby, on marriage, on faith and God, on cooking, on gardening (eventually), on the books I'm reading and enjoying, and on the things I find to keep Baby B and Baby D and myself amused. This is my life, I hope you enjoy sharing it with me:)
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